The 7 Attitudes of a Discerning Heart with Kris McGregor

Discover The Seven Attitudes of a Discerning Heart — openness, generosity, courage, interior freedom, prayerful reflection, right priorities, and God as the true end

1. Openness

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Openness is the first attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, this means learning to listen with trust — to receive God’s word not only with our minds but with the “ear of the heart,” as St. Benedict teaches. In this episode, we explore how openness helps us recognize God’s voice, let go of our own expectations, and enter prayer with faith that His will is always good. Guided by Scripture and the wisdom of the saints, this reflection invites us to begin the journey of the Seven Attitudes of a Discerning Heart.

Scripture Reading:
“The Lord came and stood forth, calling as at other times, ‘Samuel! Samuel!’ And Samuel said, ‘Speak, for your servant is listening.’” (1 Samuel 3:10)

When Samuel first heard God’s voice, he did not recognize it.
He thought it was the priest Eli calling him.
But once Eli guided him, Samuel responded with the words that would shape the rest of his life: “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.”

That short prayer shows us the heart of openness.
It is the attitude of one who knows that God is speaking, and who chooses to listen with trust.

Openness does not mean coming to prayer empty of cares.
We are invited to bring our joys, our struggles, our needs, and our gratitude before the Lord.
But in the discerning heart, openness means that after laying these things at His feet, we do not cling to our own answers or expectations.
We trust that His ways are higher than our ways, and that His word may surprise us.

To be open is to make space for God to act in ways we could not have planned.
It is to say, “Lord, I am ready for whatever You desire in this moment.”
This is the attitude of the heart that discerns well.

Saint’s Teaching:
St. Benedict begins the Rule with these words:
“Listen carefully, my son, to the master’s instructions, and attend to them with the ear of your heart.”

The “ear of the heart” listens differently from the ear of the body.
It is tuned not just to sounds, but to the movements of God in silence, in Scripture, and in daily life.

In the discerning heart, openness means cultivating this kind of listening.
Not selective, not distracted, but attentive, willing, and ready to respond with love.

Guided Application Questions:

Am I truly open to God’s voice, or do I only want Him to confirm my own plans?
Ask the Lord to show you one place where He is inviting you to listen more deeply.
In what part of my life am I clinging to my own expectations instead of trusting God’s desire for me?
Pray: “Jesus, I trust in You. Not my will, but Yours be done.”
How can I begin to listen with the “ear of my heart” each day?
Try setting aside a few minutes of silence today, asking God to speak, then simply rest in His presence.

Closing Prayer:
Heavenly Father, open the ears of my heart to hear Your word.
Grant me the grace to listen as Samuel did, and to answer You with trust.
Through the intercession of St. Benedict, may I grow in the desire to follow You faithfully.
I ask this through Christ our Lord.

Amen.

2. Generosity

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Generosity is the second attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, generosity means giving ourselves to God without reserve, echoing Mary’s fiat: “Let it be to me according to your word.” Inspired by the radical joy of St. Francis of Assisi, this reflection invites us to let go of conditions and respond to God’s call with a heart that trusts His goodness.

Scripture Reading:
“And the angel said to her, ‘Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son…’ And Mary said, ‘Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.’” (Luke 1:30–31, 38)

At the Annunciation, the angel Gabriel brings Mary a message she could never have imagined. She is told she will conceive and bear the Son of God. Her whole life will change in a moment.

Mary’s response is simple yet profound: “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” She does not ask for guarantees. She does not negotiate terms. She simply offers herself, completely and without reserve, into the hands of God.

This is the heart of generosity: a willingness to give ourselves to God’s plan, even when we do not fully understand it. True generosity is not only about giving possessions or time, but about offering our very selves. It means holding nothing back, trusting that God’s will, though sometimes mysterious, is always rooted in love.

In the discerning heart, generosity frees us. When we cling to control or keep parts of our lives closed off from God, we carry burdens He never meant for us to carry. But when we give ourselves wholly to Him, we discover a freedom and joy that only surrender can bring.

Saint’s Teaching:
St. Francis of Assisi is a shining example of this kind of generosity. Born into wealth, he renounced every privilege, not out of bitterness, but out of joy. He discovered that by giving up possessions, reputation, and comfort, he was free to live entirely for God.

Francis did not simply give things away; he gave himself away. His life became a continual yes to God, echoing the fiat of Mary. In him, we see that generosity is not loss — it is the discovery of life in abundance.

Guided Application Questions:

In what ways do I place conditions on my willingness to follow God’s will?
Ask Him to make your yes more complete, and pray for the grace to surrender freely.
How can I practice generosity of heart today?
Choose one small act of love — a kindness, a sacrifice, or an offering of time — and give it to God with joy.
When I pray, how can I echo Mary’s words: “Let it be to me according to Your word”?
Repeat her fiat slowly today, asking God to make it true in your own heart.

Closing Prayer:
Lord God, You filled the Blessed Virgin Mary with grace so she could say yes without hesitation.
Grant me a generous heart that holds nothing back from You.
Through the example of St. Francis of Assisi, teach me to surrender everything in love.
May my life echo Mary’s fiat: “Let it be done to me according to Your word.”
Through Christ our Lord.

Amen.

3. Courage

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Courage is the third attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, courage means trusting Christ even when the path is uncertain. When fear threatens to hold us back, His words remind us: “Take heart, it is I; have no fear.” St. Teresa of Ávila teaches us to persevere in faith, showing that true courage rests not in ourselves but in God who never changes.

Scripture Reading:
“But immediately he spoke to them, saying, ‘Take heart, it is I; have no fear.’ And Peter answered him, ‘Lord, if it is you, bid me come to you on the water.’ He said, ‘Come.’” (Matthew 14:27–29)

The disciples were in the boat when a storm rose against them. Waves crashed, the wind howled, and their hearts were filled with fear. In that moment, they saw Jesus walking on the water, but instead of comfort, their terror deepened — they thought they were seeing a ghost.

Into their fear, Jesus spoke words that cut through the chaos: “Take heart, it is I; have no fear.” With those words, He not only calmed the storm, but He gave His disciples courage.

Courage is not the absence of fear. Even saints felt trembling in the face of difficulty. Courage means moving forward in trust, even while fear is still present. It is choosing to fix our eyes on Christ rather than on the storm.

In the discerning heart, courage means letting go of our demand for certainty. We may not know how everything will unfold. The road ahead may be hidden. Yet if Christ is calling, courage moves us to step forward. Each act of trust, no matter how small, strengthens us to follow Him more faithfully.

Saint’s Teaching:
St. Teresa of Ávila knew well what it meant to face storms. She endured illness, criticism, misunderstanding, and many obstacles in her reform of the Carmelite order. Yet she pressed on with steadfast trust in God.

She encouraged her sisters with words that still speak to us today: “Let nothing disturb you, let nothing frighten you. All things are passing; God never changes.”

Her courage was not loud or dramatic. It was rooted in the quiet conviction that God is faithful, that His presence is stronger than fear, and that He never abandons His children.

Guided Application Questions:

In what part of my life is fear holding me back from following God’s call?
Bring that fear to prayer and hear Christ’s words spoken to you: “Take heart, it is I; have no fear.”
How can I take one step forward in trust, even if I cannot see the whole path?
Ask the Lord for the grace of courage, and act on one small step today.
When I hesitate, how can I remember to pray: “Jesus, I trust in You”?
Offer that moment to God and move forward with confidence in His care.

Closing Prayer:
Almighty God, You strengthened St. Teresa of Ávila to trust You in times of trial.
Grant me the gift of holy courage to follow wherever You call.
Calm my fears with the words of Your Son: “Take heart, it is I; have no fear.”
Through Christ our Lord.

Amen.

4. Interior Freedom

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Interior freedom is the fourth attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, this freedom is not doing whatever we please but the grace to choose what leads us closer to God. Christ teaches that “the truth will make you free,” and the saints remind us that attachments cloud the heart. St. John Cassian and St. Francis of Assisi show us that only a free heart can fully belong to God.

Scripture Reading:
“If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free… So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.” (John 8:31–32, 36)

We all desire freedom, yet the world often confuses freedom with license — the idea that we can do whatever we please. But true freedom is not about indulging every whim. True freedom is the capacity to choose the good, to choose what leads us closer to God.

In the discerning heart, interior freedom means that our hearts are not held captive by fear, resentment, possessions, or even by our own plans. When we are bound by these things, our vision becomes clouded, and it becomes harder to recognize God’s voice. But when we allow His grace to loosen our grip, we discover a freedom that brings peace.

This freedom does not come by our own strength. It is God’s grace that gently but firmly encourages us to let go. Sometimes that grip has been tight for a long time. Yet God does not demand all at once — He invites, He waits, He strengthens. Interior freedom grows as we place our trust in His love and take one step at a time.

Saint’s Teaching:
St. John Cassian taught that freedom of heart comes through simplicity and detachment, cultivated in prayer and virtue. The early monks understood that unless the heart is free, it cannot fully hear God.

St. Ignatius of Loyola later echoed this wisdom, speaking of “holy indifference” — not in the sense of apathy, but of being so free in heart that we desire only what God desires. And St. Francis of Assisi lived this truth with his whole being, finding joy in poverty because his heart was utterly free for God.

These saints show us that freedom is not about escape. It is about belonging — fully and joyfully — to God.

Guided Application Questions:

In what ways do attachments — to possessions, opinions, or fears — weigh down my heart?
Name them in prayer and ask the Spirit to loosen their hold on you.
How do I sometimes confuse freedom with doing whatever I want?
Reflect on how true freedom is choosing what leads to God, even when it requires sacrifice.
How is the Lord inviting me to say with honesty, “Lord, I want what You want”?
Pray those words slowly, letting His grace shape your desire.

Closing Prayer:
Lord Jesus, You have promised that the truth will make us free.
Grant me the grace of interior freedom, so that nothing may hold me back from following You.
Through the prayers of St. John Cassian, St. Francis, and all who walked the path of detachment, help me to desire only what leads me to You.
Through Christ our Lord.

Amen.

5. Prayerful Reflection

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Prayerful reflection is the fifth attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, it means pausing to notice God’s presence in daily life. The psalmist reminds us, “O Lord, you have searched me and known me,” and saints like Francis de Sales encouraged a daily examen of gratitude and humility. Reflection allows us to see grace and failure honestly, so we may respond to God with greater clarity and love.

Scripture Reading:
“O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar.
You search out my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways.” (Psalm 139:1–3)

A discerning heart does not rush through life without pause. It learns to stop, to remember, and to reflect. Prayerful reflection is the space where we allow God to show us how He has been present — in the blessings and also in the challenges.

The psalmist tells us that God knows us completely. Nothing escapes His gaze. When we take time to reflect, we begin to see our lives as He sees them. We recognize moments of grace that might have passed unnoticed. We also see where we turned away, where sin or selfishness clouded our choices.

Prayerful reflection helps us grow in gratitude, humility, and clarity. It is not simply an exercise in memory, but an encounter with God’s living presence in our daily story.

Saint’s Teaching:
St. Francis de Sales encouraged the faithful to make a daily examen — not only to confess faults, but to rejoice in God’s blessings and renew the desire to walk closely with Him. He wrote that reflection helps us “turn our hearts to God, raising them above the concerns of the world.”

The Benedictines also practiced this rhythm of reflection in the Divine Office, pausing throughout the day to pray the Psalms. Their lives show us that reflection is not a luxury, but an essential rhythm of Christian life.

Guided Application Questions:

How can I make time, even briefly, to reflect on where God has been present in my day?
End the day with a few minutes of prayerful review and thanksgiving.
In what moments do I experience peace, and when do I feel restlessness?
Bring these to prayer, asking the Lord to deepen His peace and heal what is restless within you.
How can I begin a simple practice of reflection?
Pray with gratitude, ask forgiveness where needed, and place tomorrow in God’s hands.

Closing Prayer:
O Lord, You search me and know me.
Help me to pause each day and see my life through Your eyes.
Through the example of St. Francis de Sales and St. Benedict, teach me to remember with gratitude and to return to You with trust.
Through Christ our Lord.

Amen

6. Right Priorities

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Right priorities are the sixth attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, priorities are ordered when God comes first. Jesus teaches us: “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well.”St. Augustine reminds us that the restless heart finds peace only in God. When we put Him first, all else finds its place in His loving care.

Scripture Reading:
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well.
Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself.
Let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the day.” (Matthew 6:33–34)

Our lives can easily become filled with anxieties — about work, family, money, or the future. But Jesus reminds us that the way forward is not found in worry, but in ordering our hearts rightly.

In the discerning heart, priorities are clear: God comes first. Everything else takes its place under Him. When we seek His kingdom first, our decisions, our time, and our relationships all find their proper order.

This does not mean life will be without struggles. But it does mean that we face them with peace, knowing our lives are in God’s hands. Right priorities free us from being controlled by passing concerns and help us walk in the confidence of His care.

Saint’s Teaching:
St. Augustine, after years of searching, discovered that only God could satisfy the deep desires of the heart. He confessed: “You have made us for Yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in You.”

His words remind us that no created thing, no matter how good, can take the place of God. To give Him first place is not to lose, but to gain the peace of a heart at rest.

Guided Application Questions:

In what part of my life do I give first place to something other than God?
Ask Him to re-order your heart so He is at the center.
How can I seek God first in prayer each day?
Begin and end the day with a short offering of love to Him.
How is the Lord inviting me to trust that if I put Him first, He will provide for my needs?
Bring that concern into prayer and say: “Lord, I seek Your kingdom first.”

Closing Prayer:
Lord Jesus, You taught us to seek first the kingdom of God.
Grant me a heart that places You above all things.
Through the prayers of St. Augustine, help me to find rest only in You.
Through Christ our Lord.

Amen.

7. God as the True End

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God as the true end is the seventh attitude of a discerning heart. In Catholic discernment, all choices, prayers, and works lead us to Him, who is the way, the truth, and the life. Jesus calls us to live the Beatitudes, keep the Great Commandment, and follow the vision of Matthew 25. St. Thomas Aquinas teaches that our final end is eternal union with God, the goal and fulfillment of every desire.

Our lives can easily become filled with anxieties — about work, family, money, or the future. But Jesus reminds us that the way forward is not found in worry, but in ordering our hearts rightly.

His words remind us that no created thing, no matter how good, can take the place of God. To give Him first place is not to lose, but to gain the peace of a heart at rest.

Guided Application Questions:

In what part of my life do I give first place to something other than God?
Ask Him to re-order your heart so He is at the center.
How can I seek God first in prayer each day?
Begin and end the day with a short offering of love to Him.
How is the Lord inviting me to trust that if I put Him first, He will provide for my needs?
Bring that concern into prayer and say: “Lord, I seek Your kingdom first.”